It’s at the flashpoints when fear of another re-rupture jerks me that I must take myself in hand.
So I say, “God is with me, and he is strong and good.”
These “times under tension” are the precise moments when, if I am strong enough to take it slow–to not dwell on the past or get anxious about the future—but to live in the tension long enough to talk back to fear, that my faith grows stronger.
For one who walks, or runs, morning, noon and evening; who cancelled three “walk & talk” dates on the way to the ER; and who had just begun High Intensity Interval Training (HIIT)—including sunrise bursts on the Sanibel beach last week—months on crutches and knee scooters are a shaking loose.
They are a real test of my mettle. They are a fire and a flood and a prising free.
I woke up in a bad way. Anxiety, sadness and—the worst—self-pity were flying all around me. The joy-snatching “If-Birds” wanted to nest.
Blessed are those whose strength is in you, in whose hearts are the highways. As they go through the Valley of Baca they make it a place of springs; the early rain also covers it with pools. They go from strength to strength; each one appears before God in Zion. —Psalm 84:5-7 (ESV) That was…