“True contentment,” G. K. Chesterton wrote, “is a thing as active as agriculture. It is the power of getting out of any situation all that there is in it. It is arduous and it is rare.”
So how do we cultivate such contentment?
Chesterton’s surprising connection between /kənˈtent/ and /ˈkäntent/ has lately been a world of help to me.
I watch the Olympics with an eye for greatness AND for humiliity. I watch the games to marvel at human exceptionalism, to stoke my patriotism, and to worship the God of people and nations.
And to what it looks like to abound. To abound with humility.
C.S. Lewis said that
“Humility isn’t thinking less of yourself. It’s thinking of yourself less.”
When any Olympic legend pauses to pray and thank God on a world stage, I see humility.
“Finish the course. You can ride 15 miles without water.”
I swallowed hard and licked my lips when my thirst surged. That worked until cottonmouth hit and my tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth.
Wierd how fierce thirst and force of habit keep me groping for a water bottle that’s not here.
Tucked at the edge of the crumpled grass, I spied a little tent— a little black-roofed, Stray Kids merch tent.
That’s when I did an unexpected thing.
I deviated from my plans. I got off the path.
Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom, must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it. Thomas Paine Freedom isn’t free. Staying free is costly, and holding freedom up takes work. The default setting on national, and spiritual, freedom toggle is off. “The condition upon which God hath given liberty to man,” a wise one said,…
I woke up in a bad way. Anxiety, sadness and—the worst—self-pity were flying all around me. The joy-snatching “If-Birds” wanted to nest.
This post is for people pleasers, for us who hate to say no. Enter Ollie the dog and a truth we need. Hey Ab. Would you possibly be willing to Ollie next weekend? We’re going out of town and he had such fun with you last time. It was true. Their black Lab was happy…
Some girls have complicated relationships with their dads. Some had trouble with God because of their earthly dads. Not me. Dad made it easy.
Is nine years a long time?
Nine years is how long this little red dress hung on its plush, velvet hanger at the far side of the guest-bedroom closet. A son came, and God did not open my womb again.
And I never quite knew what to do with the silk -little, rosy red dress.
If comparison and envy steal your joy and self-pity puts peace to flight, this contentment challenge is for you.
Blessed are those whose strength is in you, in whose hearts are the highways. As they go through the Valley of Baca they make it a place of springs; the early rain also covers it with pools. They go from strength to strength; each one appears before God in Zion. —Psalm 84:5-7 (ESV) That was…
“Daddy, will we make it?” This was white-knuckle trauma, at least to the eight-year-old daughter riding shotgun. But fumes were enough to get dad’s little yellow Chevy Luv truck across that busy intersection and into the gas station lot. Fumes were sufficient to get us to the pump. Like sufficient grace. Grace enough. Sufficient. Do…
Today is Maundy Thursday. “Maundy” is from the Latin word “mandatum” which means “command.” Maundy Thursday Love We could say it is Commandment Thursday, because of John 13:34: “A new mandatum, a new mandate, I give to you that you love one another: just as I have love you, you also are to love one…
“Hi Abigail. I’m disappointed. I thought you said we would… but you changed the plan. I wanted to share my thoughts.” My heart sank. Like most of you, I don’t like conflict. Confrontation is uncomfortable. It doesn’t feel good to expose faults or have them exposed. It would have been easy for Sage to nurse…
There’s not much I hate more than grumbling. It’s right up there with tracking mud through the house, making excuses, and lying. It’s ugly.
So you wouldn’t think I’d need the reminder.
But while I despise complaining in others, I find ways to condone it in myself. Which is exactly why these 10 words got me.
“Your grumbling is not against us but against the Lord.”
Reality hits hard. Because it doesn’t seem like my gripes against incompetent refs or frigid weather are against God.
But guess what? These 10 words tell me they are. And I don’t want to grumble against my God who does all things well. Against the God who calls me to be blameless and grumble-less and to shine.
And I said to the man who stood at the gate of the year:“Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.” And he replied:“Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the Hand of God.That shall be to you better than light and safer than a known way.” I…
These Long, Hard-Pressed Days I didn’t come into Advent knowing it would squish me like Flat Stanley. This of all weeks, I thought it would come easy. I didn’t know I would have to take joy. My workload has been heavier than any month is the past 20 years. I turned off the lights at…
We’ve had our share of disappointment. Maybe more than our share. The bench time, the botched semester, multiple mediations that went nowhere fast. Lots of hopes dashed.
But there’s that other hope—the hope that won’t disappoint. That’s what this post is about. You’ve got to know about that hope.
“Sometimes God, out of love, treats us to a good dose of delay.” In other words, God’s love delays. Sometimes grace doesn’t save and mercy doesn’t heal and somehow it’s all done in love. How can we possibly believe this?
They have no speech and still the leaves teach. In this extra-delicious Wisconsin autumn, I am learning. Here are three quick lessons in a two-minute read.
I’m faltering. I’m not sure how how to prioritize my time to best please my new boss. But God makes it easy. He has shown us what is good and makes his Father’s heart glad.
I cannot remember a time when I did not bite my nails.
But I am writing today to tell you that bad habits are breakable and good habits are make-able.
But not how you think. Or at least, not how I used to think.
Mama said there’d be days like this. And God said there’d be mercy to match. But how do you take it in hand and pick it off mercy’s tree?
“We’ve moved on with another player. The offer is off the table.” When that unjust, punch-in-the-gut news came Wednesday, this truth grounded me. It is the only mindset that could possibly convert that (bitter) disappointment into (real) joy
What Old Faithful Taught Me About God’s Faithfulness It was high time. I got my first view of the other-worldly grandeur of Yellowstone National Park last week. As I sat among the throng who crunched popcorn, positioned tripods, and collectively spoke at least six different languages while they waited for Old Faithful to blow—at 6:38…
Complaining is ugly. It is ugly in others and it is ugly in me. I cannot think of a single time when complaining was becoming. While it never looks pretty, it is all too easy. That’s why I love this little story that shows me why complaining is foolish. It puts grumbling into perspective. John…
I don’t swear to God or cross my heart and I don’t pinky promise. But I still have a problem with my mouth. In Matthew 5:37 we read, “Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything more than this comes from evil.” Jesus said that. It’s hard for me to do that. Because…
“The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life…” —Proverbs 10:11a (ESV) This post is for praise-givers. That includes you, because all of us humans were created to praise God. That’s not controversial. But the next bit may be. You are also called to praise people. The Case For (People) Praise Like wind and…
“Confirm thy soul in self-control, Thy liberty in law.” Do you recognize those lyrics? Can you name that tune? In case you’re drawing a blank, it’s from America The Beautiful, near the end of verse two. Whether you’re more ashamed at the state of our nation or “proud to be an American” this post is…
As for the saints who are in the land, they are the excellent ones in whom is all my delight. —Psalm 16:3 (ESV) What makes your heart glad? Is it the saints you know? Do you even know any saints? Saint-Friends Who Stick Closer Than Brothers This is not super-spiritual, silly talk. I know this because in…
Angels can fly because they can take themselves lightly.-G.K. Chesterton, Orthodoxy While others wax poetic this Father’s Day about how their dads taught them about God’s unfailing love or how to trust their Father in heaven—and I’ve done that too— today I’ll share something new. I’ll tell you what this deep-thinking, furrow-browed daughter who tends…
I am Gabriel. I stand in the presence of God, and I was sent to speak to you and to bring you this good news. —Luke 1:19b For all my talk about uncomfortable grace, rejected requests and love’s frets and rubs, you must also know this. I must share the good news of Gabriel, our messenger…
It is for people whom we care nothing about that we demand happiness on any terms: with our friends, our lovers, our children, we are exacting and would rather see them suffer much than be happy in contemptible and estranging modes. C.S. Lewis, Problem of Pain I would. I would rather see my sons, husband,…
“Do we need a private space?” I asked. Ginnie nodded discreetly as we ducked into the empty room across the hall. Whatever she needed to tell me, it clearly was not easy breezy. “Abigail,” Ginnie whispered, her eyes darting from my hair to the spray bottle peeking from her handbag, “I hope it’s okay if…
My mom gives the best advice. It’s timeless, as true today as it was when she gave it to the introspective, insecure 10 year old at the new school. “To have a friend, be a friend” is first. Then these two…
There is no safe investment. To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even an animal. —C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves Milky was…
I read it and reread it. No capon priest was the Goodly Fere, But a man o’ men was he. I had to look up capon. Let’s just say Jesus Christ was fully God, and fully man. I slammed into this Ezra Pound poem last year while writing my meek book and his portrait of…
Take care of your body as if you were going to live forever; and take care of your soul as if you were going to die tomorrow. — Saint Augustine Two weeks shy of my 48th, I managed a few frisky leaps on the beach. There’s something about Vitamin Sea that does it to me. But…
We will all serve God’s purpose one way or another. But will it be like Judas or John? Will he use our rebellious sin to serve him or will we delight to do God’s will? Surely the wrath of man shall praise you. —Psalm 76:10a (ESV) God many times gets up in the world on…
Therefore I should give unceasing thanks to God, for He has often been forgiving of my carelessness and stupidity. —From Saint Patrick’s Confession, Number 46 I can’t celebrate St. Patrick’s Day without thinking of Croagh Patrick and I can’t think of Croagh Patrick without thinking of the June afternoon that I climbed Ireland’s holy mountain. “Croagh” —pronounced…
“No other religion dares to take me down to the new beginning. Hence Lent is not a … long brooding over sin. Lent is a journey that could be called an upward descent, but I prefer to call it a downward ascent. It ends before the cross, where we stand in the white light of…
Tradition has it that when wide-eyed, star-struck fans met him face-to-face, he would say, “I am only a man.” But George Washington was God’s gift—reasonable, humble and wise—the perfect fit to lead a divided, fledgling nation. 12 Reasonable & Wise Washington Quotes (Ordered Chronologically) 1. Nothing is a greater stranger to my breast, or…
Loves that last welcome frets and rubs. That’s how they rise to heaven. We all want that kind of forever-love, that everlasting, never-failing, ongoing sort of love. At the very least, we want to keep our love sweet. I mean more than married love here. I mean all the “natural” loves. But as C.S. Lewis…
“Who or what you fear is that which controls you.” —Ed Welch, “What is the Fear of Man, and Why is it so Dangerous?” Mom learned to swim when I did. I was six. She was thirty-two. Imagine my surprise that lesson at the ‘Y’ when I spotted my strong, capable mom clinging to the…
It’s not my place. If I sin against God or man it is their place to forgive me. When others wrong me, it is on me to forgive them. But it’s not my place to forgive myself. Forgiveness Defined I explained in my last post that I struggle to forgive myself for one key reason:…
The real test of being in the presence of God is, that you either forget about yourself altogether or see yourself as a small, dirty object. It is better to forget about yourself altogether. —C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity I just can’t forgive myself, my friend confided. She had repented of her sin. She had confessed it…
Did you remember Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. today? I did. First, I enjoyed King’s voice in his Mountaintop speech (“Only when it’s dark enough can you see the stars.”) and then these voices singing We Shall Overcome. After that, I took notes on this podcast. In it, author Collin Hansen interviews Mika Edmondson on…
It never stayed under. No matter how hard I’d try to keep it down, it always popped up. Believe me, I’d try. I’d force the floaty under by standing or kneeling and with all the young Abigail might I could muster, I’d try to keep it under. But I never could. It always burst to…
Hurry! I think we can catch a ride if we run. So we cinched up our backpacks and raced to catch the Stanley Park bus. It offered, “free shuttle service around the park stopping at 14 popular locations.” The Rose Garden was close. Oh, and “the shuttle stops are easily identified.” Sure enough, right on…
I’ve been meditating on the Magnificat. Mary then, and I now, rejoice in our Great God of Reversals. Do you? A Personal Praise Song to the God of Reversals How many can you find in Mary’s song of praise? 46 And Mary said, “My soul magnifies the Lord, 47 and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, 48 for he has looked on…
Love invites. Good lovers initiate. But great lovers face rejection when they invite and initiate. Big Love Risks Big He came to his own and his own received him not. John 1:11 (ESV) I can barely face the risk of my favorite books being unloved, rejected. If you don’t like this book, would you please give…
But for you who fear my name, the sun of righteousness shall rise with healing in its wings. You shall go out leaping like calves from the stall. And you shall tread down the wicked… Malachi 4:2-3a (ESV) Have you ever kicked up your heels? I mean like a cheerleader or a happy little goat…
Glory to God in the highest,and on earth peace among those with whom he is pleased! Luke 2:14 (ESV) “Let God have all the glory, so we may have the peace.” The English Puritan John Trapp wrote that 400 years ago. I cannot possibly say it better. It is so good I devote this Advent*…
Are you a prisoner of hope? I am. It’s just not in me to give up. I simply cannot not hope. Which is not to say my hopes aren’t dashed. I hoped one son would get the start. He didn’t. I hoped another one would get a lead. He didn’t. I hoped my husband and…
If you’d enjoy listening to this JoyPrO post, head to the Keep On With Abigail Wallace podcast. The 1621 Project One half their number was dead. Of the 102 who crossed on the Mayflower, only 50 remained. Of 18 married couples who embarked together, just three remained intact, and of the 15 marriages represented, one…
They go from strength to strength; each one appears before God in Zion. Psalm 84:7 Going from strength to strength is unnatural. Natural is strength to weakness, or strength to weariness. I’ve run three marathons and without fail I start strong and finish weak. The 26.2 takes it out of me. Physically, I always move…
October might just be the death of me. Because I am a beauty junkie. Autumn enchants me. “Seriously, mom? Do we have to stop again?” My family knows that in October I’m apt to randomly pull the van over to take it all in. This month my bicycle weaves erratically on the backroads from golden…
I was a bitter clinger. My womb was barren. My marriage was rocky. The exile from our church hurt. I was resentful of those who blocked my chosen path and my hands held fast to my good plans. Frustrated and discontent, I huffed my way through the wilderness. I was not meek. Then I Met…
There are always flowers for those who want to see them. —Henri Matisse, translated by Sophie Hawkes Some days, joy comes easy. Those are the sunny, shalom days, when hope is high and pain is low. It flows like river those happy golden days. But other days you have to take joy. Take-Joy Days You…
Spoiler alert: My wound is not healed and I might mention blood. This post is not about scars and it’s not about surgery. It’s not about a dozen metaphors that raced to mind for very real emotional and spiritual wounds. It’s not about how sometimes our good God wounds, or even about his rich wounds….
Are you a hot mess? A broken soul? Ruined and a wreck? Check, check, and check- all in the past two weeks, I’ve been. But there is a balm in Gilead. There is a poem for that, as your ruin falls. But I am not a poet and—if haiku and limericks are excepted—I do know it….
Percheron mares, aged 3 and under 4: Please enter the ring, sounded over the arena loudspeaker. His pleasure is NOT in these strong horses? resounded in my bemused brain. The draft horse stable is just inside the east gate at the Walworth County Fair. Each year we stop to see the horses. And each year, in…
What Do I Even Take From You? That dagger was thrust at me by someone I love very much. Someone close who declines invitations for meals. Someone who doesn’t realize that sometimes to receive is to give—that sometimes not to take is to take. Honestly, before this week I hadn’t realized it either. I had…
Pain, Op & Post-Op This was a big week for me. A big week for me to give thanks. Because my pain got bad in July. Then an ultrasound found a huge mass. Surgery was scheduled for August 16th. I had a month to wait. A month to talk back to the little aches under…
They trust not God at all who trust him not alone. Not at all? Them’s fightin’ words. I read them once, twice, then promptly looked for a way around them. Because of course I trust in God and in other things. Then I heard about the little dog named Nolie who stepped out onto a…
This is a true story about the bone-breaking power of words. At least if what my sister told me about her friend Jan is true. I’ve met Jan and I think it is. Jan was a 40-something blonde on her way home from an event in the city. She was lost in thought when roused…
Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth. —Matthew 5:5 We cannot see the world as God means it in the future, save as our souls are characterized by meekness. In meekness, we are its only inheritors. Meekness alone makes the spiritual retina pure to receive God’s things as they are, mingling with…
Are you in denial? It doesn’t seem like you’re taking this seriously. Do you realize what’s going on? Actually, I don’t know what’s going on. But I do know that surgery is scheduled and that the doctor expects it will explain the seriousness and cause of this pain. There are moments when waves of “worst-case…
I had some intense, unexplained pain last week. The constant ache made it hard to think, hard to write, and hard to smile, plus it kept me awake. Just to sit—to sit—made me wince. My margins for movement were razor-thin. I learned that hurt constricts, that pain makes life feel tight. Then, in the throes,…
Have you had it where words won’t come? When your heart hurt so much that it bled, but none of that precious ink would drain through your hand? Could it be that God designed dying seasons with your writing life or pride in mind? Working, and Writing, in Secret I’m guilty. I act as if…
Want to be more interesting? It just might start with being more interested.
We hit a new low in our home this week. On Monday, strong grace led me to a place I never wanted to go. But First The Deer But I’m not writing for sympathy. I’m writing to tell you that the God is good. He gives peace. He gives rest. I’m not whistling Dixie. I…
Maybe this one beautiful life is a grand unpeeling, humbling, coming down. Maybe this is the gift. Onion-Peeled Me The layers keep coming off. Parenting peels. I can’t count the judgmental, “My child would never do…never say…never those grades,” layers that have been stripped away. Three years ago I couldn’t have imagined. Time froze the…
Did you hear the mystic chords today? You’re not so sure how they sound? That’s okay. The Sound Of Mystic Chords They sounded like “Present arms,” and “To the front salute,” from a weak veteran with a strong voice. They sounded like America the Beautiful and The Battle Hymn of the Republic sung from the…
Would you rather listen? Here’s that link to the Keep On With Abigail Wallace podcast. I’m not good at letting go. Sometimes I hold on to dreams that aren’t God’s plan for me. For better and for worse, I am the bee—the busy bee that won’t rest until it extracts sweet nectar from every flower….
What rolls off your tongue when you’re in trouble? What comes out when you’re in a prison or a cave? How do you pray? Like A Song, It Came “Help me,” “Heal us,” and “Have mercy,” are desperate prayers my God has heard lately. There’s also been that prayer for a prodigal. But last night,…
Meet my moms. The one on the left has been my mom for 47 years, the other for 25. They’re both very easy to love. Reason #1: My moms bake the best pies. But their methods are not the same. One rolls a butter crust that might just mix with whole wheat flour. The other…
No one can make you feel mad, bad, sad or less-than. I used to tell that to myself and my sons. But it turns out, I was wrong. People absolutely can make us feel mad, bad and less-than. People can set us off. Specifically, they can set off a neurochemical response we can’t resist. But…
But I am a worm and not a man, scorned by mankind and despised by the people.All who see me mock me; they make mouths at me; they wag their heads; “He trusts in the Lord; let him deliver him; let him rescue him, for he delights in him!” Psalm 22:6-8 (ESV) Why do you believe in him anyway? God doesn’t do anything on this earth…
I Am From I am fromA hard-rock maple, leaves-in, dining room tableA rusty Ford Granada and Dad’s brassy menorah I am fromA parsonage beside the red barn churchA little white goat barn and the huge console radio where the Sugar Creek Gang came I am fromVegetable field gardensWhose open arms taught me there’s return on…
Y’all! I have some happy news to share in this short post. I’ll do that in a minute. But first I’ve got a quick update. Update #1 I’m nearly done with the draft for the Meek Not Weak (or A Taming Grace?) Bible study guide. Across five summers, 175 pages and a 25-page book proposal…
Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. Philippians 3:8a If I’d Have Known If you would have told me 10 years ago that this is where I’d be, I think I would have collapsed in a heap. If you would have told me, as I…
I am Patrick, a sinner, the most unlearned [rustic] and least of all the faithful and utterly despised by many. —Saint Patrick, Confession One Sometimes I feel less-than. When I do, it’s often because I’m painfully conscious of how uncultured I am, keenly aware of my rusticitas. Like Saint Patrick was. Cousins and friends have earned Ph.D.’s and my…
It has not been tried and found wanting. It has been found difficult; and left untried. G.K. Chesterton wrote that about “the Christian ideal.” But it’s just as true of Paul’s treatment for anxiety. In other words, we can be freed from anxiety. Moment by moment, hour by hour, if we are willing to exert and apply and fight the…
He staggered not at the promise of God through unbelief, but grew strong in his faith as he gave glory to God. Romans 4:20 I didn’t plan to write this post today. But then came a 1:30 AM wake up with another parenting struggle that nearly made my faith stagger and did keep me from falling back…
I am a mess of unfinished business. I feel pangs of “in process-ness” every single day. Not that I have attained or been made perfect, Paul said. But if there is anything true, lovely or admirable about me, odds are it was shaped by my friends. The truth is, I wouldn’t be me without my…
When upon life’s billows you are tempest tossed, When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost, Count your many blessings name them one by one, And it will surprise you what the Lord has done. Johnson Oatman, 1897 Is it ever right to count other’s blessings? I could barely keep silent as…
Here we are traveling and our home is a distant home in another world… Though we meet with traveler’s fare sometimes yet it should not be grievous to us…. Consider what your condition is, you are pilgrims and strangers, so do not think to satisfy yourselves here. —Jeremiah Burroughs, The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment What’s…
One of life’s highlights of late has been the budding kinship with “my Hope*Writer friends.” I’ve told you about comparing, scarcity and working our own little territory and described how so often joy comes when we choose what we didn’t (at first) choose. Enter Allison, one of those new friends. She is young, fresh and…
Are you ever going to finish that meek book, Abigail? Give birth already. It’s been six years since you started. Kate was blunt. But she was not the first one to mention my unfinished book. Not Complete Do you have piles of unfinished projects? I do. A glance at piles of notebooks with unfinished drafts…
Mama. Oh mom, oh mom, oh mom, oh mom, my 13 year-old moaned. My stomach hurts so much. Mama, please come. I wished he’d called for Papa instead. Because Mama was nestled, all snuggled in bed. The heat was turned low and she didn’t want to go. After a week of late nights, I’d set…
Our family has faced our hardest times yet these last few weeks. We’ve “expanded our circle” of helpers and burden-sharers. It’s humbling. Yesterday my hot-mess sobs stopped the ladies’ prayer time cold. But today I want to share the good coming out of all this: I’m learning not to judge. Judge Not Oh, sure, I…
Love is spelled T-I-M-E but that’s not the only way to sound love out. It’s also spelled I-N-I-T-I-A-T-E. Initiate. 1. Great Lovers Initiate We love because he first loved us. 1 John 4:19 Initiate. There’s not much zing to this 4-syllable, 8-letter ‘i’ word. Love is spelled time has a better ring. Don’t get me wrong. Love is spelled time. But…
Your Pardon For My Typos I owe you an apology. Yes. I do mean you. Because you, dear reader, are still reading. And unless this is your very first JoyPrO post— and if it is, a big warm hug of a welcome to you—you’ve suffered your way through an unkind number of typos. Once upon…
“Listen to what I mean, not what I say.” My husband knows those words well as they come from his external-processor wife. My best friends know how to “take and sift my words,” as the poet wrote. To keep what is worth keeping And with the breath of kindness Blow the rest away. But I…
There are good reasons people choose not to adopt. I heard a lot of them. But this week, we celebrate adoption day. Don’t Force The Duck Think he’ll like the duck? I wondered aloud. No idea. We’d never done this before. Jim was as clueless as I. But I had followed the agency directions and…
How long do you wait? Not, how long do you wait in the drive-thru or the phone queue before you opt out? I mean, how long until you remind or text the “❓“ or ask again? Do you anguish over that? Sometimes I do. How Long Do I Wait? Lots of times I jump the…
If you have raced with men on foot and they have worn you out, how can you compete with horses? Jeremiah 12:5a Our culture is getting so soft. No one can handle criticism. People just wilt. I can’t tell you how many times that gist has come up in conversation lately. I’m no expert on…
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” -God, to Paul Is Sufficient Enough? Sufficient. Do you like that word? How does it sound in your ear? Does it sound sort of meager, barely enough, and just scraping by? We prefer different words—words like abundant and lavish and great—to…
We get stronger by lifting others up. The words on my friend’s shirt caught my eye, and I mentioned it. Yeh, John looked at it and said, “Really?” My friend is not a hypocrite for wearing that shirt even if her “domestic encouragement” lapses — even if she’s not constantly lifting, as on mother eagle’s…
Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm. Winston Churchill I heard an expert say that you are qualified to teach a “master class” if you know 10% more about something than others. A handful of scintillating course topics I could teach crossed my mind when she said that. Then Sorry,…
We shall be like the bee That booms against the window-pane for hours Thinking that the way to reach the laden flowers. From C.S. Lewis, Poems Writing on the Wall So is that what everyone thinks I should do? I should switch schools? That’s the best solution? It was already the second week of school….
Note: A version of this post appeared in February 2012, the month Uncle Kevin went home. That post—I Hold Your Hand—was the first post written for JoyfullyPressingOn. Firm Hold No, Mom —no! It’s very scary. I don’t want to go. Pleeeeease—nooooo! Waterpark guests stared. Lifeguards raised their brows. I tightened my grip on the four…
The “disease model” of mental health asserts that good feelings come effortlessly to “normal” people, so bad feelings are evidence of a disease…Here is an alternative: Happiness is a skill that must be learned… Refuse to see happiness as an entitlement. Loretta G. Breuning, “The Therapy-Industrial Complex,” THE EPOCH TIMES, 8/25-8/31/2021 Work For Your Joy…
From the end of the earth I call to you, when my heart is overwhelmed: Lead me to the rock that is higher than I. Psalm 61:2 I had no strength to hope and my mind wouldn’t rest. The tension from work wouldn’t let go when I fell into bed. After 20 years on the…
The line separating good and evil passes not through states, nor between classes, nor between political parties either — but right through every human heart. —Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn, THE GULAG ARCHIPELAGO That’s it. If you need the TLDR, it’s that. Your greatest enemy isn’t outside of you. Because like it or not, you’re primed for polarity….
“Till sin be bitter; Christ will not be sweet.” Thomas Watson, the Puritan, said that. I agree. Make sin taste bitter and repentance taste sweet. I texted that to girlfriends who love rebellious teens with me. We don’t always know how to pray. But that one sentence I pray often. Because I know from experience…
Not playing it well. I’m the far left of the herd. We are led to believe that the Author will have something to say to each of us on the part we have played. The playing it well is what matters infinitely. C.S. Lewis, The Last Night I’m not sure if the role was…
The trouble is that what we call ‘asking God’s forgiveness’ very often really consists in asking God to accept our excuses. —C.S. Lewis, “On Forgiveness” My tongue burned to tell all. All that led up to that rash word I spoke to Carrie that morning. How she was silent when I needed her most. How…
I don’t get it, Mom. Why did Aunt Danielle get Ella all those pretzel bites? Ella* was the only one who whined and cried on the drive and now she walks out with the pretzel bites. Just her—no one else. That does not seem right. I had to agree. As much as I talk about…
We all need refreshers. We need to hear the old and familiar explained again so it doesn’t become stale and taken for granted. That’s what this quote was for me: a timely reminder of the purpose of grace; the reason for the grace in which we—and that includes me—stand (Romans 5:2). It’s from a chapter…
Beloved and tempted—is that you? If so, there’s no shame in it. Because you can be both at once. Jesus was. Sorely Tempted And Dearly Loved This post has one point and this is it: Don’t ever doubt when you are in the wilderness and sorely tempted that you are still dearly loved. The flow…
Can what is effortful be graceful, too? I would have thought them opposites. But after gazing at this bumblebee, I wonder. Because exertion and elegance were together on display. And I think they often stay together in the way of faith. Exertion And Elegance A Taming Grace is the working title of “that meekness book”…
I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it. —Evelyn Beatrice Hall Liberty is meaningless where the right to utter one’s thoughts and opinions has ceased to exist. That, of all rights, is the dread of tyrants. It is the one right which they first of…
For physical training is of some value but godliness is of value in every way, holding promise for the present life and the life to come. 1 Timothy 4:8 It didn’t surprise me one bit. Elizabeth Elliot exercised daily. This bold-meek saint and spiritual mother to so many trained her soul and her body. Theeulogy said…
The words of King Lemuel. An oracle that his mother taught him: What are you doing, my son? What are you doing, son of my womb? What are you doing, son of my vows? It is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine, or for rulers to take strong drink… Proverbs 31:1-2, 4 Preparing Royal Palates Is there…
Ab, it was hard. A couple times it was actually sort of traumatic. I’m healing from other wounds. Now I’m processing this. I swallowed hard. This was us. When Friends Keep Their Distance Jess offered that in a phone call after our families had been together. She’d seen us up close. Jess was gentle, but…
But you, O Lord, are a shield about me, my glory, and the lifter of my head. Psalm 3:3 What do you know about David? I mean, beyond slaying Goliath and sleeping with Bathsheba? Did you know that God said (Acts 13:2), “I have found in David the son of Jesse a man after my heart“? Why was David…
Wrath is cruel, anger is overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy?Proverbs 27:4 Hey, Jealousy Anybody can sympathise with the sufferings of a friend, but it requires a very fine nature to sympathise with a friend’s success. By this measure, Oscar Wilde’s measure, my nature is not very fine. I get jealous. Sometimes—when a friend shares a joy I…
Driving out -ites is effortful. It’s hard work to hold back weeds. Despite all our pulling and digging, wild mustard grows like gangbusters and burdocks keep sharing their spiny seeds. In fact, I plucked some burdock off my running tights this morning. Two steps off the trail was all it took; they latched on before…
Weeds don’t take no for an answer. The Canaanites would dwell in the land. To take is not the same as to possess. So how can you drive out the enemy and truly possess the land? How Persistent These Weeds My proud, melancholic temperament turned up again Thursday. It might have looked like low-spirits, sickly,…
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away…
You cannot be profoundly influenced by what you do not know. Let’s talk about influence. Dr. Pepper seltzer, Tim Hawkins, the ragged copy of My Utmost in her WC twenty years ago that led to one in mine; the elegance of Hedgehog and Goudge and countless other good books, whole cream in coffee, radish slices…
Happy St. Patrick’s Day! I’m not sure if Patrick’s heart swelled like mine did at the sight of Cliffs of Moher, but I do know a few things that made both our hearts beat fast. If you’ve followed JoyPro across the March 17th’s, you know that I’m quite taken with the “rustic” Saint. First, a…
My country girlfriend braved Chicago traffic last week. Because her husband’s cancer is still there, still growing. He’s barely 40 and his first brain surgery was ten years ago, before their youngest could even walk. So off they drove to the big city to determine if he qualified for an experimental new treatment. But 48…
Asking you to tolerate whatever I do or say because you say you love me is a fundamental misunderstanding of what love is and what love does. Much of what we think love is simply isn’t love after all. -Paul David Tripp, New Morning Mercies If You Love Me, You Would… Have you ever said…
We hit a new low. We’ve had bad weeks in our house before, but this week’s behavior borders on criminal. Still, there’s a reason this blog is called JoyfullyPressingOn. My times are in his hands; every jaw-dropping event in his providence. To protect the guilty one I love, I won’t share details. But trust me,…
Despite its bad press lately, Facebook isn’t a bad thing. I still hold that Facebook is a great tool to give grace. But when a good thing becomes an ultimate thing it’s an idol. When you’re willing to sin to feed it or sin if you think you’ll lose it, you may be feeding the…
I don’t know which was the bigger miracle—my question or his answer. Miracles Never Cease The first title of this post was “Miracles Never Cease: How The Phone Stayed Home.” It was an amazing, soaring short story about how a son who so loved his phone willingly agreed to leave it at home for a…
Idols? What idols? And why would you want to identify your idols? After all, asking these questions is like plunging into Lake Michigan on February 1st. Exposure stings. It’s painful in the moment, but— my Polar Plunging niece tells me—you’re glad you did it once it’s done. Exposing our idols at once stings and bites…
Cut comma, delete clause, better word. First impression! No typos on this one, Abigail. Big breath. Triple check. Read it out loud. Read it again. Breathe. Post. Scarcity Is it wrong to want more influence? Is it bad to try to build your tribe? And is it sinful to want more opportunity to make a…
1 Marriage (& Friendship) Tip Hair fades, brows crease, and it is all grace that our marriage has endured to year 25. But even with 24 years under my belt, I’m no marriage expert. I do have one quick tip, though. I call it the THAT’S WHY I MARRIED YOU game; AKA: CALL OUT THE…
Good books are a very great mercy to the world. Richard Baxter I finished the list—the 23rd list. Compiling the Piquant Page-Turner ladies’ book club annual book list is both one of my favorite and one of the most difficult things in all the world. Partly because I feel a sacred trust. Selecting in which…
In 1948, C.S. Lewis published a poem called, “The Turn of the Tide.” In it, he imagines the cosmic significance of Christ’s birth. Rest assured, the tide has turned. It might not feel like it, but feelings lie. Oh sure, we’re still in these long last days and I’m still one of the poor orn’ry…
I can’t wait for 2020 to be done! 2021 has got to be better. I keep hearing that and I’m just not so sure. But I know we have need of endurance. Need Of Endurance That’s how the author of the book of Hebrews put it, For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what…
Ooh. That sounded condescending, I confessed seconds after using the phrase, “So cute.” The topic? Christmas decor. What does condescending mean? asked the 13 year-old son. Like you’re God’s gift to the people you’re with. I paused, As if they’re beneath you and you’re so great to get on their level and give them the…
We didn’t know what discountenanced really meant until Bilbo started his smuggle in Smaug’s lair and Gabe bawled, I’m not listening. Then he plugged his ears and shouted, I can’t hear you. But he could. We can’t hear, Bud. If you don’t obey and quiet down, you will be punished. He did not and he…
I’d like a white horse for Christmas. I wouldn’t mind some strong coffee and bright sunshine, but a white horse tops my list. Here’s why. Advent Darkness This year has had the feel of an eternal Advent with all the waiting for answers, longing for healing and fights for peace. I feel the ache. This…
Thanksgiving this year will be different. The massive Considine clan will not gather for the first time in my adult life. Thoughts Of Former Thanksgivings There will not be the moment when I walk into my Uncle Nathan’s house and stunned by the dozens of beloved aunts and uncles and first cousins who are now…
I love to hear my friends pray. Hearing them pour out their hearts to God encourages me. When Prayer Time Is Silent Conversely, one of the biggest deflators I face as a small group leader is deafening sound of silence. Sometimes it’s like this: I pray. Others are invited to pray. But if the people…
When’s the power coming back on, Mom? the 13 year-old called from somewhere down the pitch black hall. By 8 o’clock, I hope. For Roboman from the electric company had assured me of that time when I called at 4:45. Well, Roboman was wrong. He was off by almost a day. We did homework by…
Fraught? Fraught is the word of the week. As in headlines like, “How is TV news going to cover the weirdest, most fraught election in US history?” Or, “How to talk to kids about the election and fraught politics.” Fraught, fraught, fraught. Fraught. Election or not, our lives are fraught. So just what is “fraught”?…
We have to be push-backers, Abigail. Truth demands it. That from a recent email from a friend-who-shall-go-unnamed. This post is that: a little pushback. It is not a call to civil disobedience, to wear a mask or to take it off, or even to vote. It is a call to not live by lies—a call…
Holding Out for a Hero is back on my playlist. This election season gets me belting it out with Bonnie Tyler. Where have all the good men gone? Isn’t there a white knight on a fiery steed? Trump & Biden: Not My Heroes Admittedly, this might feel like a bait and switch. Because you thought…
One of the marks of a certain type of bad man is that he cannot give up a thing himself without wanting every one else to give it up. That is not the Christian way. An individual Christian may see fit to give up all sorts of things for special reasons–marriage, or meat, or beer,…
The more I love humanity in general the less I love man in particular. Fyodor Dostoyevsky The more I love humanity in general the less I love man in particular. In my dreams, I often make plans for the service of humanity, and perhaps I might actually face crucifixion if it were suddenly necessary. Yet…
In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’ Acts 20:35 Meg’ll like that, I thought, tucking in a gift card with the note. Meg is my friend’s daughter….
She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. Proverbs 31:26 I could go right down Proverbs 31 line by line and apply each virtue to Mom. It would be easy. Because my mom is easy to praise. In fact, that’s how this post started (See me later for…
You have been my friend. That in itself is a tremendous thing. -E.B. White, Charlotte’s Web She writes fiction very well. I write nonfiction not so well. My Friend Cathe But my friend Cathe is the one who called me up after reading a post one summer dayand said, “Abigail, there’s something wrong.” I braced…
Something bad happened, Mom. You don’t want to know. So ended our easy Saturday morning. I do want to know, Gabe, I assured, kneeling before him. Then my seven year-old showed me two of the most obscene gestures I’d ever seen. The sun went dark. But ever the prisoner of hope, I thought: Maybe they’re only meaningless motions to…
Good Friday turned great just before midnight. That’s when my pride died. Again. This side of heaven, it won’t stay dead. I cannot share details. But I can tell you that it happened when a friend confronted me about my wounding words. Before Pride Died But before pride died, I want you to know that…
For he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the deadly pestilence.He will cover you with his pinions, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness is a shield and buckler.You will not fear the terror of the night, nor the arrow that flies by day,or the pestilence that stalks in darkness, nor the destruction that wastes at noonday. Because you…
I’m lost. Going from so busy to no busy is harder than I thought, Jan wrote. I’m struggling to find any rhythm or routine these COVID-19 days. Don’t Waste These COVID-19 Days I feel Jan’s pain. Two weeks ago we were sent home-kids with their Chromebooks and teachers with their lesson plans- for God knows…
Thank you, good daughter, is what my dad said. He said it last summer as I helped haul hay from the wagon to the mow. That wasn’t the only, but it’s the last time I recall. Today’s my good dad’s 70th birthday. Let me tell you a few things about him. But in some big…
My family celebrated St. Patrick today, but capped at 10 only. Dad read from the Confessions and we sang St. Patrick’s Breastplate. I wore my green Irish sweater and made mashed potatoes. It’s St. Patrick’s day. But it’s also the day that all the schools in my town locked up and the library shut down-…
Nooo! I am so embarrassed! I half shouted, half cried. Why didn’t you guys tell me? Didn’t you see this spot? Death By Chocolate Spot No one has ever died of embarrassment. And I’ve lived through other wardrobe malfunctions. But, my oh my, how they hurt my pride. Parent-teacher conferences were last night. I’d sat across from…
I had my plans. But here I was again as they fell apart, getting bent out of shape, buzzing like the bee, That booms against the window-pane for hours Thinking that the way to reach the laden flowers My laden flowers? A few quiet hours alone with my man on Friday night. That was my…
I’m not content with my discontent. In fact, I’m downright discontent when my soul is not at rest. Which is, I think, as it ought to be. Easy To Please I’ve always been drawn to “low maintenance” types. The friends who take a 30 minutes to fix their hair and another 20 for makeup aren’t *naturally my…
If this is the way you treat your friends, no wonder you have so few. -Teresa of Avila Even if you’ve never said it, you’ve probably felt it. St. Teresa’s words can stab us when we’re suffering. After all, aren’t we friends of Christ and Children of God? (Ps. 25:14, John 15:15, 1 John…
Today is day 14 of the 40-day sugar fast. The last post explained why I’m fasting. This post is about how. Fasting By Faith & For Faith Yesterday a friend who’s fasting with me asked, What’s one thing you’re learning? In typical Abigail fashion, I proceeded to give her five. Then I thought of…
“Why you putting all that chocolate in there, Mom? That was from Christmas. You like that stuff,” Gabe wondered aloud as he watched me pack it all in the little plastic bin. “I’m not eating sweets for 40 days, Bud. Because I want to be more hungry for God.” He shrugged and then begged for…
But Mary treasured up all these things, pondering them in her heart. Luke 2:19 Do you ever ponder? I mean, do you take time to think about and reflect on a thing, what Miriam-Webster defines as, “to weigh in the mind”? Pondering isn’t the same as drifting. It’s not the same as what occupies your…
Even though no zig-zagged, half-heart BFF charm has ever graced my neck, I really love my friends. I’ve been given some great ones. Lately, I’ve been thinking how much my friends fit me. I mean how they shape, form, fit and transform me. I’m learning. Truth #1: No one likes jealous, clingy friends. Enjoy a…
It’s my thing: the annual Thanksgiving post. Mayflower’s Daughter came first. Then came Why Pilgrims Don’t Grumble and smitten by William Bradford, A Poem For Pilgrims. Next was It Really is Good to Give Thanks, and last year I asked Do You Leak? (For the record, it was about roots of grumbling not moms on…
The note said without saying, Thanks for holding your ground, Mom. You were right not to give in to me. And I love you so much. It was taped to the coffeepot Saturday morning. He said he put it there because he knew I’d find it. Now I’m putting it here so you don’t give…
One of my writing goals is to normalize struggle. Another is to energize grace. Struggle Is Good What I mean by the first is this: I want my readers and friends to know that struggling with bad stuff is good. That struggle with sin is both normal and good. In fact, I expect and solemnly…
“If a thing is worth doing, it is worth doing badly.” G.K. Chesterton Perfectionism Paralysis Perfectionism paralyzes. For perfectionists, the perfect is the enemy of the good. According to productivity gurus, it’s also the enemy of the done. Because perfectionism is crippling. When the project looked great on Pinterest, but then the drive to make…
I have trust issues. But they’re not sp much with trusting others, they’re more with others trusting me.
Whatever you do, please don’t tell Gabe you know he plays with toy dragons. I mean, that he works hard battling dragons. And whatever you do, copy him. Play hard: Imagine.
We did it! Hyunjin said, beaming. Atop the empty grandstand, amid dust kicked up by the Massey hauling plow for the rodeo that night, Hyunjin slapped me one exultant high five. Why? Because with 30 minutes of a month to spare, he- we actually- finished HELLO UNIVERSE. For the record, I don’t recommend HELLO UNIVERSE. The…
I have not learned the secret of contentment. I am learning it. But my old soul still gets ruffled and squirmy when I’m not in on decisions that affect me. And maybe that are just, like David wrote, “too great and wonderful for me.” But this last time around taught me that having a weaned soul, a content soul, must mean trusting that our Father sees what we can’t see, knows what we don’t know and and can manage what we can’t manage. Believing this calms the soul.
Optics matter. As much as it hurts a no-pretense, country girl like me to admit it, they do. In case you’re unfamiliar with the term, optics means how a thing looks to an outsider. The word is often applied in the worlds of politics and business. A politician playing golf as his home state is…
Those who carried materials did their work with one hand and held a weapon in the other. Nehemiah 4:17b It was incidental and mentioned merely in passing. It wasn’t the point. But on the heals of that weekend, smarting from that blast from a friend and that hideous snarl from my mouth, the pastor’s almost…
Be not like a horse or a mule, without understanding, which must be curbed with bit and bridle, or it will not stay near you. Psalm 32:9 About Mules A mule is the offspring of a male donkey and a female horse. They’re said to be more hardy than horses and more intelligent than donkeys….
Does God ever lead us into temptation? The Pope says, “No way,” and changed the Lord’s prayer this month to so that it isn’t so confusing. But if God doesn’t tempt us, then why would Jesus teach us to pray this way?
At 10:45 Friday night, the dreaded red light showed up and it did its little dingy thing and five minutes into the cycle it quit. Our brand new dishwasher was done.
Sometimes pity is a beautiful thing. Other times it’s ugly. Only one thing that determines which it is: Break my heart for what breaks yours, one song goes.
But maybe the flip side is, don’t let my heart break for what does not break yours. Or at least, don’t hold back from speaking truth in love even if it hurts. Like Jesus did to Peter.
When good speakers prepare, they anticipate the questions their listeners might ask. Last weekend I was blessed to speak at a women’s retreat. And there was one question I was not ready for. Perfectionism, Stagnation, or Growth? I’ll tell you about the question that stopped my cold in a minute. But let me start…
It’s a strange feeling when you pay for something that’s already yours. Like an old barn cat. But this redeeming reminds me of something Tim Keller said, “We are more sinful and flawed in ourselves than we ever dared believe, yet at the very same time we are more loved and accepted in Jesus Christ than we ever dared hope.”
What’s your secret? How do you stay so healthy? she asked.
Right in my wheelhouse. Because I do have a few secrets. None of which involve dietary supplements, protein powder or juicing. Some of which involve…
What matters supremely, therefore, is not, in the last analysis, the fact that I know God, but the larger fact which underlies it—the fact that he knows me. J.I. Packer, Knowing God Gevalia Gold Coast coffee, dark-chocolate covered almonds, and Downton Abbey CDs. Two friends recently gifted me with these. Then came the rush. Do…
What’s the biggest disappointment you’ve experienced in your life? How do you cope? What do you do when good things you thought God promised you are further away than when you trusted him?
On this day, 210 years ago, an overcomer was born. And, for the record, to be an overcomer, you need to overcome. There’s no easier way. Abraham Lincoln overcame.
Why is it we can so easily say yes to big, exceptional things, but trip over the little, ordinary things? Why is doing the the mundane with joy so hard?
This is Dave. He’s a friend, even though Dave can’t remember my name. But Dave doesn’t take his memory problems lying down. Which is why we might all take a few memory tips from Dave. Because I, for one, know that I have memory problems too. I call it spiritual amnesia. It happens when we…
I haven’t a clue who has been tucking the big bucks in the pews Bibles or why. But I can’t miss the metaphor…