2 Things Great Lovers Do

Baby Jesus in manger love come down
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Love is spelled T-I-M-E but that’s not the only way to sound love out. It’s also spelled I-N-I-T-I-A-T-E. Initiate.

1. Great Lovers Initiate

We love because he first loved us. 1 John 4:19

Initiate. There’s not much zing to this 4-syllable, 8-letter ‘i’ word. Love is spelled time has a better ring.

Don’t get me wrong. Love is spelled time. But sometimes we get it best and feel it most when love comes in other languages like gifts or touch or kind words or service. Love is spelled a lot of ways.

But great lovers initiate. They forgive first and confess first. They invite you before you invite them.

Great lovers take the lead.

When Love Goes First

If you remember your brother has something against you, leave your gift at the altar. First go be reconciled. Matthew 5:23b-24

This is a very hard thing. It takes supernatural strength and superhuman love to go to an offended brother or sister and initiate peace.

First, be reconciled. Go to her. Don’t wait for her to come to you. Initiate.

The best lovers go first to make peace.

I know this because Love came down at Christmas. For God so loved the world that he sent his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him will not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16). God sent. He went first to seek peace, to bring life.

Because of his great love, God being rich in mercy, made us alive in Christ when we were dead in our trespasses (Ephesians 2:4). That is the only place in the New Testament when God’s love is called great love.

Great love brings life. Eternal life is peace with God. Great lovers seek peace. He loved us to life when there was nothing lovable in us. We were dead.

So the Great Lover took the lead and made dry bones live and stone hearts soft as flesh.

Because the best lovers don’t wait. They peace make. They initiate.

2. Great Lovers Risk Rejection 

He came to his own and his own received him not. John 1:11

I can barely face the risk of my own favorite books being unloved, rejected. If you don’t like this book, would you please give it back? I’ll find you a better one.

One year, I actually did jot that note and slap it on the front of the book. Talk about tacky.

But I fear bigger rejections too. I fear the rejection of my invites, children, writing, ideas, and efforts. I grow weary of going first. Confessing first and forgiving first, clearing awkward air and making peace are risky. They’re all rife with the risk of rejection. And there’s a real chance we’ll be misunderstood.

Jesus faced rejection. The Man of Sorrows was despised and rejected by men (Isaiah 53:3). His great love would be misunderstood and spurned.

But for Love Himself, it was beyond risk. In sure and certain omniscience, he knew some would not receive his gift.

He knew some would reject His love. His life. Him.

Follow Love’s Lead

And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. Ephesians 5:2

Relationships are risky. But, nothing ventured, nothing gained. Jesus was rejected. If we’re reflect his light, we will be too. The old carol says, To Show God’s love aright, She bore to men a Savior when halfspent was the night.

Lovers take risks. Friends take risks. Parents take risks. To show his love aright, God’s kids take risks.

You’re invited! Aren’t those about two of the most happy-making words ever? It was only November 13th and there it was. An Evite Invite to the Greene’s New Year’s Eve party. Their early invite showed love.

I got it covered! Or how about when your husband not only cleared his schedule, made the reservation, but also arranged childcare so he could take you away for a night? His initiative spelled love.

Want to walk in an hour? Christin texted me to ask for a walk before I asked her. It’s risky to invite because you might be rejected. What if I already had another walking date? Her text expressed love.

These are little risks. We can only love like this because he first loved us.

But he did love us first. So we can follow his lead.

Know This Love

God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who he has given us…God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:5, 8 

Initiate and risk rejection for God’s sake.

That’s what’s ringing in these ears this Christmastime. It’s two sides of love I hadn’t much seen. Maybe I’m feeling it now as I ache for someone to initiate, to invite, to take a chance on me.

Then I remember.

A Great Lover did.

Come; see the place where the young child lay. Look at the manger: there is Lamb for the burnt-offering,

Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.”

These little tender hands shall yet be torn. These feet that have not yet trod this rough earth shall be nailed to the tree. That side shall yet be pierced by a Roman spear; that back shall be scourged; that cheek shall be buffeted and spat upon; that brow shall be crowned with thorns—and all for sinners!

Is this not love? Is it not the great love of God? 

Horatius Bonar

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